In a new quickie interview in the March issue of Elle, Matt Bomer, the un-out gay actor and star of “White Collar” who, apparently, has a husband and a child and who has claimed that Hollywood actors like himself need to be more like con artists when it comes to revealing their sexuality, says:
My favorite actors are people I don’t know anything about, and I can project any character on to them. They focus on their work and then go live their lives with the people they love.
Thing is, in an interview with Details, there’s this:
Q: Your father played for the Dallas Cowboys. Ever think you’d be a football player?
A: I grew up in Texas, and there’s really no other social option on a Friday night. I played through high school and enjoyed it. I was okay—not great. But my senior year I ended up getting cast in A Streetcar Named Desire and left the team for the part. My parents were actually really cool about that decision.
Yeah. Bomer can talk about where he grew up, playing football, what he did his senior year, his father, his father’s career, and how cool his parents are, and it’s somehow not personal information? If he were consistent in his statements that his personal life is off-limits then he should have responded to the Details question with the exact same answer he gave during the Elle interview, “My favorite actors are people I don’t know anything about, so I am going to pass on the question since answering it would reveal personal information about me.”
No, no, his real response is just hypocrisy, plain and simple.
You know, if we lived in a world of total equality Bomer’s words would make some kind of sense. But in a world where every single piece of equality that LGBT people have won has been obtained with the blood and sweat of people who bravely and daily fight against oppression, Bomer and other actors words and inactions weaken the resolve to fight back, weaken the belief that we are not second-class citizens who must hide in shame. The reason he is able to go live his life with the people he loves is because of the LGBT rights battle — the battle from which he has recused himself.
I really don’t have a Bomer vendetta. If he’s having trouble reconciling his gayness with his job, then by all means, he should take his time and figure things out. Coming out is a deeply personal process. But why on earth does he have to keep giving interviews that damage the LGBT civil rights movement? Why does he need attention so badly that he is willing to undo any of the hard work of generations of LGBT activists who cared less about fame and more about human rights? Why does Matt Bomer keep talking?
(click pic to read)
16. February 2010 at 12:18 pm
god, he is pretty…
16. February 2010 at 12:49 pm
there is a lot to admire about him . . . on the outside . . . .
16. February 2010 at 9:48 pm
Matt has done nothing to hurt the cause. Since USA Network spent $10M on marketing his new show and several hundred employess – writers, staff, production etc. depend on it to pay their mortgages, maybe he is considering the negative affect officially coming out would have on all. Hollywood is still homophobic and after all he was burned once during the superman issue. He has actually never been in the closet and it’s 3 children.
17. February 2010 at 1:17 am
Normally, I love your posts, but come on! I don’t think Matt’s having as much trouble reconciling his “gayness” with his job as others are. He’s just a person trying to live his life the best way he know ho. To expect him to be anything else, like a symbol or a role model, is unfair to him. Not everyone wants to be an advocate, and who’s to judge those that don’t. Just let him be.
17. February 2010 at 7:18 am
@Mel,
I hear what you’re saying. I do. Sometimes these things can seem like a very tall soapbox, I know. But when a person wields enormous influence — whether he’s a politician like Carl Kruger or a celebrity like Matt Bomer — he does have a responsibility to, well, be responsible. And when he does or says irresponsible things, we also have a responsibility to call him out on it.
17. February 2010 at 8:42 am
akawilliam – i’m usually on board here but disappointed in this post. matt doesn’t owe any of us anything. he is trying to make a living at what he loves. unfortunately hollywood is a mine field casting wise for out male actors.based on interviews, he aspires to have leading men roles and sadly out gay male actors are not bankable in the eyes of hollywood execs. neil patrick harris did the noble thing but will likely not get another ‘straight’ leading role, time will tell.let’s give matt some time, once the show is more established he will likely comment publicly on being out since he has never really been in the closet in hollywood.
17. February 2010 at 8:54 am
I have to agree with Mel. Not everyone wants to be an activist. And let’s face it, there’s a vast difference between saying “yeah I played football in high school” and the deeply personal matter of who he chooses to be in a relationship with. As a lesbian, I’m not at all offended by his statements and I don’t feel like he’s hurting the cause. To be honest, I find it highly offensive that so many people seem to think they have a right to demand that he make an announcement he’s obviously not comfortable making. The real hypocrisy here is to say in one breath what a deeply personal matter coming out is, and the next to essentially say that he should have to whether he wants to or not. No one, and I mean no one, ever has the right to demand that of someone else. That’s more harmful to the cause than Matt’s polite evasiveness could ever be.
3. March 2010 at 11:45 am
Amen, Laura. I found this post because it was linked to from the one where NPH offered advice to a gay teen, which was awesome. But NPH has also said himself he doesn’t think anyone should be forced to come out. Matt is an actor- his only “responsibility” is to try to be decent at his job. I hope he will come out, but in the mean time, forcing someone to speak about these things is wrong. And talking about a childhood and coming forward about your sexulaity in a world like this are very different things.