AKA William

Okay, last we heard from Vanity Fair’s George Wayne, he was “interviewing” our love Rachel Maddow. I say “‘interviewing’” because it was a legendarily awful and offensive interview. Wayne was out of his depth, out of his element, out of his league with Maddow.

In a new interview with DADT-repeal hero Lt. Dan Choi, Wayne is still out of his league, but he is able to focus his attention on something we can all appreciate — hot bubble butts. Namely, Lt. Dan Choi’s.

Wayne was at the party celebrating the opening night of the play Next Fall when he spotted Choi. Wayne writes:

“I don’t remember your name, but aren’t you the poster boy fighting to repeal ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’?” The surprisingly tall, impressively brawny combat veteran laughed uproariously. “I don’t know if I am the poster boy,” Lieutenant Dan Choi said. “But whatever you say.” G.W. says you should do a nude pinup calendar—guess who would be the photographer? He laughed even louder.

So how tight is that ass of yours, Lieutenant Choi? “Why don’t you see for yourself?” Game on! G.W. spun the army boy around. Can I touch it? “You can touch anything you want.” So this horny toad groped the left cheek. (I’ve heard of bubble butt—but his was simply queenious! Eat your heart out, Eric Massa!) Are you married? “No.” Are you on the market? “Yes. Are you interested? Maybe I’ll give you a discount.” G.W. remained silent. “I hope all this is off the record.” No, we are not, he was reminded.

There we have it. Lt. Dan Choi has a “simply queenious” bubble butt. Which surprises absolutely no one, right? Choi looks like his booty is rockin’. Know what we need now? We need Daniel Nardicio to work his magic!