Classmate Explains Why Constance McMillen Was Sent To Fake Prom: Because She’s Lesbian!

Photo from the secret prom

Lindsey Begley, who, according to her Facebook page [ed. note: I'm not going to link to her page because she is, after all, a minor -- if you need to find it, you can Google it] is a senior at Itawamba Agricultural High School with Constance McMillen. And in the comments section of La Figa she explained exactly why, after weeks of fighting for the right to attend prom with her girlfriend, Constance was, instead, sent — along with a handful of special education students — to a fake prom while the entire rest of the senior class went to the real prom. Begley explains why: “She’s playing the lesbian card to prove she ALWAYS gets what she wants.”

I’m just going to let Begley explain. Yesterday afternoon she wrote:

**Open Minded Readers Only**
I am a senior at IAHS, and I’ve known Constance for the last 6 years. Please hear our side of the story before you decide on our fate.
The party we had in Evergreen (the county neighborhood I live in) is 30 mins away from the school. we rented out the community center, hired vendors, decorated, and our parents ran the security/chaperone staff- but it wasn’t prom. Prom was at the country club where constance and 7 other students were. The reason the senior class boycotted the actual prom was not because we hate gays. We wanted a drama-free gathering to celebrate 3 great years and 1 lousy one together, and we wanted to lay low. We also wanted to do it without the main cause of the lousy. What people are failing to realize is that much of the fault of this whole stink lies with Constance, not her mistreatment by the school district, but her crazy-reckless need for attention. It sounds mean and horrible and like we planned it all specifically to embarrass Constance, but we didn’t. We let her have her prom with her girlfriend and her tuxedo and we went to party it up in the “boondocks” not because we wanted her rights violated, but so we could salvage what has turned into a total fiasco. As a whole we didn’t support her decision to throw the district under the bus, or her insinuations that we’re all just a bunch ‘a hicks driving around in beater pick up trucks spitting tobacco and burning crosses. IAHS is one of the top schools in the state and I’m proud of that, and I’m proud that we took a stand and just said you know what? forget it, we have just as much right as you do to have a party for ourselves. So we did, and now we’re getting flack because poor Connie’s ego got a bit of bruising. She’s playing the lesbian card to prove she ALWAYS gets what she wants. This time, we didn’t just let her.
Take it as you will, because I’m sure it sounds like we faked her out, but understand this- the decision NOT to attend prom had nothing to do with the school or with Constance’s sexual preferences; it had everything to do with proving we weren’t going to let her and the ACLU steamroll us into doing what Constance wanted. We flexed the muscle of the majority and we’ll suffer the consequences.

It sounds like an attorney got a hold of both Lindsey and her comment because a few hours later, Lindsey wrote this:

Thanks to everyone who has responded to my post from earlier this evening. First want to apologize for the misrepresentation of the motives behind our decision. Secondly, I want to apologize for any discomfort I must have caused all you revolutionaries who are working so hard to bring change to such a small minded place as Itawamba- but do me one favor. Please, do not assume that every graduate from IAHS is stupid, incompetent as I seem to all of you. I ask that you forgive my very emotional attempt at defending my home. I personally believe that the whole thing has turned into a tempest in a teacup, so to speak, and I wish now that things could have been changed. Again, I ask you though please do not sterotype my school, county, state, or region based on what I have said. Thanks again.
Lindsey

Yes, this girl is young. Yes, what she wrote is incredibly bigoted. But she’s not the only one to look at here. The Facebook page “Constance Quit Yer Cryin’” has 486 fans [ed note -- commenters have informed me that those who support Constance have taken over this page, which explains its growing number of fans]. The parents of the students organized the secret prom. And many students at the high school wrote some rather unpleasant things about the prom on their own Facebook pages.

Shameful.

This has been an ugly episode that has gotten uglier. And highlights Constance’s courage all the more.

(image via)

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61 Responses to “Classmate Explains Why Constance McMillen Was Sent To Fake Prom: Because She’s Lesbian!”

  1. Karley
    April 6, 2010 at 10:41 am #

    Actually, I think most of the membership of the anti-Constance group is from trolls. There’s no telling how many people signed on in earnest now.

  2. Karley
    April 6, 2010 at 10:43 am #

    By “trolls” I mean pro-Constance ones. :)

  3. Xopher
    April 6, 2010 at 11:30 am #

    So, first she told all kinds of lies, then she admitted being a lying sack of shit. I’m not impressed. I want to hear from some students from that high school who AREN’T bigoted assholes, or I’ll just go on assuming they all are.

  4. MB
    April 6, 2010 at 12:40 pm #

    McMillen and her date were THE featured couple of the privately-sponsored school prom, an event that resulted from activist McMillen’s ACLU-backed law suit against the school district’s no ss couple attendance policy.

    LGBT community activists brought McMillen’s suit to the attention of mainstream media, a very few of which chose to cover the story. Most did not.

    McMillen’s activism and pending lawsuit guaranteed her place as center of attention at the event, regardless of who else attended.

    The prom was boycotted by most other students, including other *gay* students.

    McMillen can only activate and sue for tolerance, not social acceptance.
    Her demand for a prom to which she could bring her ss date was provided, as had been advertised.

    No one was required to attend the prom but everyone was required to tolerate it’s existence. And they did.

  5. AKA William
    April 6, 2010 at 12:55 pm #

    @MB,

    You seem to be unaware of the history of racially segregated proms. The very same logic that you are using to justify holding a secret non-gay-inclusive prom is the very same logic that was used 50 years ago for holding non-black-inclusive proms. Please see this article to understand just how much what happened with the Itawamba prom this past week resembles a Birmingham prom from 1965 — http://news.google.com/newspapers?id=XSAfAAAAIBAJ&sjid=qacEAAAAIBAJ&pg=6862,5131613

    It is a tragedy for everyone involved in this Itawamba prom debacle that history has, again, repeated itself.

    If there is, indeed, another side to this story, as you are suggesting, I’d love to be put in touch with the other gay students who boycotted the prom.

  6. Shay
    April 6, 2010 at 2:34 pm #

    @MB… If not for the IAHS administration refusing to honor Constance’s request to attend her prom with her girlfriend this conversation would not be taking place. There would have been no need for the ACLU to become involved.

    The IAHS school district,students,and parents intolerance is why Ms. McMillen is the center of attention. Having a separate prom guaranteed IAHS more negative press. If you want to point a finger I suggest you direct it at Lindsey Begley. Her little rant only added fuel to the fire. She also managed to strenghten peoples already low opinion of the IAHS school district. IAHS students & parents made a poor decision an now they have to deal with fallout.

  7. Carol
    April 6, 2010 at 2:41 pm #

    Hey there,

    The “Constance Quit Yer Cryin” page was started by classmates of hers who were “fed up” with the “trouble” she casused the school and her class. However, most of us became “fans” in order to criticize the existence of the page and Constance’s treatment at the hands of the school, her classmates and the bitchy parents who organized the alternative prom. We, the supporters of Constance, now own that page.

  8. Patrick
    April 6, 2010 at 2:43 pm #

    Essentially the top link will take you to a FB listing of many of the highschool’s students, from there you can go to each individual page (if you want) and see plenty of prom night photos and other damning stuff.. The Second link is to the local store that apparently provided many of the outfits used.. there was reportedly 50 or so photos of students before the group was removed by the owner. It would be incredibly sad if even the storefronts in that small town colluded on this.

    The third link is to one black girls prom night photos. The fourth link is the last time someone “tricked” a girl into attending a fake prom, it contrasts really well with the third link.

    Sorry for the jumbled freehand nature of this note.. wish I had more time to further delve into this..

    Itawamba Agricultural High 2010 Link: http://www.facebook.com/srch.php?init=b:classmate/coworker&sid=1657187947.NOQ..2&ed=33573994&hs=33573994&n=33573994&k=100008000&hr=2010&nm&em&wk&o=4&s=10&hash=62a731c77c943b50e7093b709afb3871&sf=p

    TJ’s Pagent & Formal Wear: had plenty of Prom Photos but took down their Facebook Page when the Internet noticed, I’m guessing the Female owner of the store has kids that go to the same highschool, link to her website (I would suggest DNSSTUFF.com to access phone # and complete name): http://tjspageantandformalwear.com/aboutus.aspx

    Shaquail Gate’s Prom Photos (note: only black girl I could find who attended prom, might be good to contrast this with the google link following her facebook link) – http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=54328&id=1063397351
    http://news.google.com/newspapers?id=XSAfAAAAIBAJ&sjid=qacEAAAAIBAJ&pg=6862,5131613

    The below link takes you to a photo of Shoquail with the proprietor of TJ’s pageantry making a comment. Damning evidence indeed.

    http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=1162127&id=1063397351#!/photo.php?pid=1162125&id=1063397351&fbid=1385261065906

  9. Christy Andersen
    April 6, 2010 at 4:28 pm #

    There will be those who hate Constance because she is a lesbian. But these are kids whose senior year has been under a media spotlight of which they are heartily sick. They have seen that this girl would rather have their prom canceled than not get her way. Constance has ruined their senior year. Her motives, the rights-and-wrongs of the original case – teenagers who have been under pressure for this long aren’t likely to be looking at that. They didn’t want to have their prom become yet another part of the Constance McMillen media show, to spend the whole night having it be Constance, Constance, Constance. And yes – they’re angry with her. So she wasn’t invited to a PRIVATE party. It might not have been the right thing to do, but we’re talking about angry teenagers here. They just don’t like her – and not only because she’s a lesbian. We can’t force social acceptance, only tolerance.

  10. Joey Y
    April 6, 2010 at 5:10 pm #

    @Christy Anderson, that has to be the lamest cop-out I’ve read in a while. This was also handled by awful, POOR excuses for ADULTS who didn’t see that this was WRONG. If you want to make excuses for this disgraceful town and group of human garbage, then you belong right alongside them.

  11. Joey Y
    April 6, 2010 at 5:16 pm #

    I’m amazed at the obviously different writing style of the second comment. It’s practically a press release, and clearly not the work of the same person who wrote that ridiculous initial screed. Obviously, it was a lawyer or something, unless this bigoted girl suddenly got a WHOLE lot smarter in a few hours.

    Also, love the formal wear website’s introduction: “I am TJ Denson. I started this business because I was tired of paying ridiculas prices for dresses and accessories for my two daughters to be in pageants.”

    Maybe the parents really ARE that stupid, if this is how you present your business. Get a spell-checker!

  12. MB
    April 6, 2010 at 5:23 pm #

    @AKA WILLIAM . . I am aware of the history of segregated proms in the South, including the knowledge that there are a number still today. They were not and are not school sponsored.

    Slowly, this practice has been changing at the initiation of black and white students who have become friends and colleagues through their high school years. In their junior and senior years these students work together with the school boards for all-inclusive school-sponsored proms. It’s been an evolutionary — not a revolutionary– process, and continues as such. Social acceptance is a slow process, and not required by law.

    I am not familiar with the King-Miller case for which you provided a link — thank you. Upon reading it, however, I do not see an analogy to McMillen’s case.

    From the article, it appears King-Miller, the ONLY black student at JVHS, was intentionally and cruelly tricked into believing the *school-sponsored* student prom was to be held in the SCHOOL GYM. When she arrived at the gym on the appointed day it was dark — obviously no event had been mounted –for anyone — at that venue. Instead, the school sponsored prom planners had intentionally changed the venue and witheld the address. The school did not cancel the school-sponsored prom — it was intentionally and deceitfully mounted elsewhere.

    IAHS (legally) cancelled the school-sponsored prom rather than comply with McMillen’s demands. Every student was made aware of the cancellation. A privately funded, *all-inclusive* event was mounted instead (“the prom”) and all students were notified. When McMillen (and others) showed up, the event was when and where it had been announced. McMillen knew in advance that while her demands were tolerated as a result of the law suit (the all-inclusive event mounted), they were not *socially* accepted.

    Most students boycotted the all-inclusive event and chose instead to attend a private party apparently mounted in response to the all-inclusive party, and to which McMillen and others were not invited. Exclusion, yes — but perfectly legal, as are the private, segregated proms that still exist (but which continue to *evolve* out of existence.)

  13. Josie Fuller
    April 6, 2010 at 5:53 pm #

    This is on Lindsey Begley’s facebook wall:
    Lindsey Begley .:does anyone know who’s in charge of the parent prom?:.
    March 22 at 6:35pm
    Really? it wasn’t a prom?
    Disgusting.

  14. Raymond
    April 6, 2010 at 5:56 pm #

    You know, this is America. If a group of people want to be different, they have every right. If a group of people (no matter how large) want to have a private party, it is their right. The “school” still had their party. No matter what you do, people are still going to be defiant, whether that means “different” or “not accepting”. So it doesn’t matter what “you” do, we all have the right to do whatever we want.

    Gay people can be just as unforgiving, ignorant, belligerent, close minded as straight, conservative Christians.

  15. Bronxman
    April 6, 2010 at 6:53 pm #

    What everyone is failing to address are the feelings of these 7 handicapped children…why were they excluded frome this “private” party? it just shows that this town (of which i used to be a proud resident) reallly is a biggoted predjudistic place that deserves to have their asses handed to them in court or otherwise…fuck them all

  16. Cameron
    April 6, 2010 at 8:10 pm #

    Glad to know the south is still filled with religious backward, bigots. You all are failures. Failures in life, failures in morality, failures in respect. Pretty much failures in every way that counts.

  17. Jimmy Fury
    April 6, 2010 at 10:42 pm #

    @Cameron – wow. As a gay southerner I gotta say that was pretty… harsh. It was also the exact same behavior you’re complaining about.
    The south isn’t as bad as people paint it. I’ve lived all over the country and I promise you there are just as many bigots everywhere else. Some of the smartest atheists I know call Texas home, everyone knows Atlanta has the best Drag Queens, Tampa churns out some great gay porn, and the rudest people I have ever met in my entire life were residents of western Massachusetts.
    Southerners are just loud so they get noticed more.

  18. Michelle
    April 6, 2010 at 11:07 pm #

    “They have seen that this girl would rather have their prom canceled than not get her way.”

    Constance wanted to wear something nice and take someone special with her to the school dance just like, and among, her high school peers. That would’ve been getting her way.

    It was the SCHOOL who would rather cancel the prom than let her do that.

  19. Michelle
    April 6, 2010 at 11:10 pm #

    @Jim Fury: “As a gay southerner I gotta say that was pretty… harsh. It was also the exact same behavior you’re complaining about.”

    I’ll grant you it was harsh, but I’m troubled at seeing these expressions of fed-up frustration compared to being ‘just as bad as what we’re complaining about.’

    Because we’re complaining about segregation. I like to think that’s not so paltry a matter as to put it on par with.. saying something harsh.

  20. MB
    April 6, 2010 at 11:51 pm #

    @Michelle:

    *By her own admission* McMillen was encouraged by her lesbian mother and her mother’s activist friends to use the prom to force a contest over lgbt rights.

    As a “lone lesbian activist student in a Southern school” she has a much more marketable media story than as a well connected and supported agent of older, experienced lgbt activists.

    The gay media “mafia” has been called out on repressing this information for their own purposes.

    But look what the gay media has done for McMillen — launched her as a gay media darling, providing money and celeb status within the community as only the lgbt community can do!

    While McMillen was busy with her lgbt political agenda, many of her senior classmates (including non activist inclined gays)chose to celebrate their high school years with a party elsewhere, privately, *free from* an lgbt agenda.

    McMillen is protected to pursue her lgbt agenda publically and her classmates are protected to pursue private partying that *excludes* an lgbt agenda.

  21. Martelle
    April 7, 2010 at 12:07 am #

    I actually agree with Cameron.. As a Gay, Southern Baptist Preacher’s Kid, I feel he’s “preaching” the truth.. Growning up n the south, its Southern Hospitality, never judge a book by its cover, judge not les’ u b judged, God doesnt like ugliness.. And when something Non Traditional happens they R they 1st ones to go back on everything they said & taught us growing up.. So its pretty much practice more what u preach!! And YES Atlanta has AWESOME queens!!

  22. nickthedick
    April 7, 2010 at 2:44 am #

    First of all, a high school senior did not write either of those statements. Second of all, who gives a shit? Still, the sentiment presented is entirely valid. What the shit do a couple of high school girls know about their sexual preferences? I’m a grown adult and it’s still something I grapple with.

    Don’t get me wrong, high school socials are an idiotic practice that are assigned far too much value. Which is exactly where I step off the sympathy train. If the gay girls in question took their situation seriously, they would’ve just skipped it entirely instead of making a media spectacle of it.

    They aren’t winning any sympathy from the wider world. They’re just reinforcing the misconception that gay people on the whole are looking to paint themselves as victims and are itching to forcibly insert themselves into more traditional, heterocentric aspects of life.

    “We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it.” needs to be replaced with, “We’re here, we’re queer, so what?” This is not controversial.

  23. freddybear
    April 7, 2010 at 3:27 am #

    You said this girl Lindsey is a minor. But she’s also a Senior in high school. By Mississippi standards, wouldn’t that make her about 25?

  24. MertvayaRuka
    April 7, 2010 at 3:45 am #

    Ah yes, the “gay mafia”, with their insidious agenda of trying to have LGBT folks treated like everybody else. How evil.

    Look, MB, I can all ready tell you’re insincere with the use of the tired old “gay mafia” bit, but the school could have avoided all of this attention if they’d, oh I don’t know, NOT CANCELED THE PROM. Constance didn’t MAKE them do that, it was their own decision and no doubt an attempt to use collective punishment to inspire other students to kick her back into line. It failed. Then these twits decide to hold a “private birthday party” except their kids were too stupid to resist gloating about it on Facebook and on blogs supporting Constance using their own easily-tracked emails as usernames. A perfect example of how bigotry and stupidity go hand in hand. Sure, it was all “legal”. It was also intentional, deceitful, discriminatory and because one of the attendees had a fit of self-righteous whining, now EVERYONE knows the reasoning behind it and what these folks were up to. They’re busted. Worse than that, they busted THEMSELVES. This is why bigots always fail; because all the devoted and enthusiastic people on their side are usually devoted and enthusiastically stupid.

  25. Helen
    April 7, 2010 at 4:37 am #

    What? Was the whole district made up of kids who never passed grade five? Acceptance and human decency are just completely out of the vocabulary here, aren’t they?

    I sincerely pray that Constance and those six others go on to great things (and what school is this that still teases disabled students in the 11th and 12th grade?), and whomever thought it was a good idea to have this fake event and participate or condone this utter discrimination crashes and burns. At the very least, I am glad that this school, the students and parents defending the stupidity, are in the media. We can now point to that entire district as an example of what petty hypocrites look like.

    We’re in 2010, grow up and learn to deal with the people who make up your community.

  26. MB
    April 7, 2010 at 9:38 am #

    @MertvayaRuka: “Look, MB, I can all ready tell you’re insincere with the use of the tired old “gay mafia” bit,”

    I hope your gaydar is better than your radar for sincerity — I am quite sincere in my post.

    As for the gay mafia…first, I referred to the “gay media mafia.” Having been a working part of it for years, I’m quite qualified to call it. And believe me, they revel in using that phrase to refer to themselves. The greater the gay spin and frenzy they can whip up the more money they make (or in the case of the current economy, stay afloat if they can.)

    But don’t believe me — check out the gay activist community’s call out of “the gay press mafia.” Here’s a sample on this specific story (McMillen) for which I’ve provided the link, and you can find plenty more from a google search.

    From RENWL: Restore Equality Now~West Adams/LA South Marriage Equality And Community Activists

    “Gay Press Busted: Lesbian Mom Of Constance McMillen No Small Oversight

    We found it strange that since the story about gay teen Constance McMillen broke no mention has been made whatsoever about her parents. It’s not like this kid just took off on her own and decided to hold a press conference extolling on her outrage about not being able to take her girlfriend to the prom…

    Instead, they [the gay press] have trivialized the scenario as this teen kid taking matters into her own hands and creating a national sensation…

    Shame on you gay press mafia for once again sidestepping the simplistic and all encompassing power of truth in your desire to sensationalize and manipulate the LGBT civil rights journey.”

    http://renwl.org/news/gay-press-busted-lesbian-mom-of-constance-mcmillen-no-small-oversight

  27. Jimmy Fury
    April 7, 2010 at 10:29 am #

    @Michele. There’s no excuse for hate directed at an entire group of people. None.
    That /is/ bigotry and yes, it’s the exact same thing we’re complaining about.

  28. AKA William
    April 7, 2010 at 10:53 am #

    @MB,

    You are so thoughtful about this issue, and your comments are as appreciated as they are puzzling.

    Constance had her civil rights violated by the school district. She fought for those rights with the help of many people. And, in fighting for her rights, she was fighting for all of our rights, gays and straights alike. How can the students and the parents of the students who orchestrated the “private” prom fail to understand that by not supporting Constance’s courageous fight they are, either purposely or perhaps inadvertently, encouraging a world where not everyone is equal, where civil rights don’t really matter?

    In standing up for her right to go to the prom, Constance was reiterating the great and many civil rights fights of the past 100 years. And all of those students at the private prom left her to fight it alone.

  29. Janice Dodd
    April 7, 2010 at 1:08 pm #

    I have to say one thing. It is simple. All the nonsense, about blaming the
    victim, reminds me of the old times. The girls that were raped were blamed by
    the public as dressing too provocatively, or some such thing.
    This is simply a matter of… if the school would have said ok. It would have
    been no big deal. No harm no foul. The reasons that these bigots all laid out
    for their behaviors were not to be needed. PERIOD. END OF STORY. So I am sick]
    of the irrational rationals.

  30. SEB10
    April 7, 2010 at 4:21 pm #

    I KNEW YOU FAGGOTS WOULD COP OUT AND COMPARE BEING AFRICAN AMERICAN TO BEING A RAGING LESBIAN AND HOMO’S THE THING THAT YOU ARE FORGETTING IS THAT YOU CAN HIDE BEING A SILLY LIL GIRL THAT LIKES TO EAT CARPET AND A HOMO THAT WANTS TO JUMP EVERY DICK HE SEES. YOU CANNOT HIDE BEING AFRICAN AMERICAN AND THE TERM BLACK THAT YOU SO EASILY TYPE OUT IS JUST STUPIDITY IF YOU WANT TO GET ALL PC AND SHIT. THE TERM BLACK WAS MEANT IN A NEGATIVE CONNOTATION MEANING CRUEL AND NOT RIGHT. I TOTALLY SUPPORT THE MAJORITY OF THE SCHOOL TALKING TO THEIR PARENTS AND SETTING UP A PROM WHERE THEY DID NOT HAVE TO BE PARTY TO WHAT THEY THOUGHT WAS BULLSHIT. THE SCHOOL PROM WAS NOT CANCELED AND THAT IS PARAMOUNT IF OTHERS DID NOT WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL SPONSORED PROM THEY DID NOT HAVE TO IT IS CALLED RIGHTS. EVERYONE DOES NOT GO TO THE SAME AFTER PARTY AND EVERYONE IS NOT INVITED TO AFTER PARTIES. THEY ONLY THING YOU LESBIANS AND HOMO’S ARE DOING IS JUST MAKING MORE PEOPLE HATE YOU SO KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.

  31. Jakeinlove
    April 7, 2010 at 4:22 pm #

    I’m sorry but as an adult you may as well get used to this type of criticism. The explanation of your actions make you an uglier (emotionally) group of individuals than any report could ever do.

  32. Burkey
    April 7, 2010 at 5:55 pm #

    All the persuasive pseudo-logic posted by MB is nothing more than justification for people acting like assholes. It’s akin to John “Mr. Yes” Yoo’s legal arguments giving the executive branch authority to break treaties and torture prisoners. It might sound all nice and reasonable, but what at amounts to is just more pure ugliness.

    It’s all bullshit.

  33. Gaven
    April 7, 2010 at 7:04 pm #

    She left out the part where some of those 7 other students were special needs children, so they discriminated against 2 minority groups.

    I just hope the Today show gets a hold of this.

    Those kids need to be taught a lesson and that there are consequences towards their actions.

  34. BC
    April 8, 2010 at 12:07 am #

    You know, I’m gay and from South Mississippi, and I agree with this student. It is disheartening to see so many gay people completely ignore the whole point in this student’s post. I don’t know if it is some blind allegiance to the cause, but a rational thinking person would not jump so far as to call this student a bigot when she clearly states the separate prom was not because Constance was gay:

    “Take it as you will, because I’m sure it sounds like we faked her out, but understand this- the decision NOT to attend prom had nothing to do with the school or with Constance’s sexual preferences…”

    Moreover, I do have to agree with her insinuations over Constance’s cry for attention; the girl got a $30,000 scholarship from Ellen for her “troubles.” This turned from a ploy for acceptance into a he-said-she-said attention game, and the more and more gay people who give into the game makes me fear there are no really open-minded individuals after all. Gays can say they are open-minded, but having affection for someone of the same sex has nothing to do with one’s social interpretations: it is simply a preference in a mate.

    I’m not making any outright defense of Mississippi. Just like other places in the world, it has its textbook bigots and civil issues. However, what I have seen since this event has begun is nothing but negative allegations FROM the gay community, out of all places. Fundamentalists will be fundamentalists…they will be bigots and there is very little to change their minds. But the area is not FULL of fundamentalists, and all disagreements with Constance are not rooted in fundamentalism. Northern Mississippi is a quiet area, and the disturbance of peace is problematic: Lindsey, like many others, just want a return to normalcy. It’s again disheartening that the gay community wishes to be viewed as “socially normal” but constantly bashes people who wish to remain normal. Not only is it hypocritical, but it does more harm than good when gay people jump to conclusions because a group of people want to ignore something, not out of hatred, but out of a return to peace. It also unveils a shallowness that, I fear, is quickly encompassing the gay community. There is no strive for knowledge or individual interpretation on a matter: there is only a group mentality which can be dangerous if the right knowledge does not exist, and rationality is allowed to take helm.

    Again, as a gay man, I have a strong desire for civil equality, especially in the US. However, as a thinking man, I also believe in interpreting the details before jumping to conclusions.

    -BC

  35. Toddges
    April 8, 2010 at 12:50 am #

    God, how I wish I could be an openly gay teen in a tiny religious town! It would really boost my Hollywood career and pay for college!
    Read “After the Ball” by Marshall Kirk. This kid knows exactly what she’s doing. That $30 grand scholarship from Ellen is just the beginning. The whole world is checking up on her (even London). Making sure those kids treat her like royalty or else the big celebrities will.
    She will be an instant star BECAUSE of this. She couldn’t land a better job in Hollywood than if she had a movie studio executive for a brother.
    Trust me; there will be a movie all about this kid not getting to wear a tux to her prom. This all started over a TUXEDO. If she had just worn a dress and danced with her girlfriend she would not have gotten arrested. Schools have dress codes and life goes on.
    Kids, if you live in the south or midwest, and you can’t pay for college, simply come out of the closet, especially on your college cover letter. Come out and get paid and get free college and go to the top Ivy Leagues easily. I’ve seen it work. You will get a free pass if you are gay in a small town. My brother told everyone he was gay and he got into the school of his choice and got promoted 3 times in 2 years at his media job that he loves.

  36. G.
    April 8, 2010 at 1:15 am #

    Sounds like this girl is just like the many entitled rich white kids that made my life a total Hell when I was in high school. Glad she graduated and graced the other kids in that school with her absence…

  37. Phoenix Blaze
    April 8, 2010 at 8:48 am #

    WTF?!

    Some of you think ‘a free ride’ is what gays get nowadays? Geezuz. Is it any wonder why our culture is f***ed up? I grew up gay in TEXAS, and I can tell you that during my high school years…IT WAS PURE HELL! Since heterosexuals run everything you assume that the rest of the world feels the same way you do and thus experiences it the same way! WAKE UP! Have you ever been denied access to your partner in a hospital? Have you ever been turned away when wanting to donate blood? Have you ever been told that you actions are an aberration of nature? Have you ever been arrested for being who you are? Have you ever been told that you can’t marry the one you love? Have you ever been physically beaten for who you are? Have you ever had your work credited to someone else because they are straight and it’s better PR? Have you ever been told that you will never be a fit parent? Have you ever had to sign a document to work promising you won’t sue because of your sexual orientation? Have you ever been grouped together with rapists, murderers, and child molesters in discussion groups? And lastly…Have you ever been told that you are EVIL BECAUSE YOU WERE BORN?!!!

    No? THEN SHUT THE F*** UP CAUSE YOUR EMBARRASSING YOURSELF! If you cannot speak from experience then your words hold NO MERIT! It’d be like taking financial advice from a poor person! YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT!

    What Constance did goes beyond petty money or power(which only short-sighted individuals see). It is a reminder that we still have a long way to go for TRUE EQUALITY! And for ANYONE to say that this is ALRIGHT reveals the lack of love and compassion in their heart and souls! The one thing some of you “Christians” seem unable to do is to forgive and love unconditionally, just like your savior did! And hey, Catholics: How ’bout giving up BIGOTRY for lent? Hmm? I’m sure Christ really appreciates that you gave up Diet Soda when he gave up his life you!
    Or the fact that the Vatican supports the molestation of children! Yeah, you’re the IDEAL of humanity, aren’t you? Guess I’m just a greedy opportunist because I want everyone to live and love in TRUTH and FREEDOM and live in a world in which we tell our children, “You can be anything you want,” and MEAN IT.

    Oh…and if GOD really ‘hates gays’ then why does he KEEP MAKING THEM? He must have left a switch on somewhere!

  38. milowent
    April 8, 2010 at 3:48 pm #

    MB seems close to the situation, but I wanted to make a big point where he/she is wrong: the private secret prom was not really a “private” prom at all it was a continuation of the original school prom. The secret prom used the same “masquerade” theme and decorations of the official school prom – its unbelievable. this was not noticed until earlier today when the puzzle pieces were joined together via facebook.

    i posted it on facebook:
    http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=3852964&o=all&op=1&view=all&subj=367776042862&aid=-1&id=665563923

    the school district is against the wall now. school-sponsored segregation. you can’t create a fake prom and then have the real prom you planned ALL ALONG and lied when you said you “cancelled” it somewhere else.

  39. Neal Hicks
    April 8, 2010 at 11:56 pm #

    I’m sorry, but this girl can say the whole rest of the student body just had a “party” but when the school and the students and the parents all plot in secret to move like 98% of the prom to a private party, that party becomes the prom. And not a single one of them had the decency to spill the beans. The school system, that could have avoided all this fail by just treating one of their students with decency and respect, managed to blame the whole flap on the student, blaming the victim, so all the students and parents got mad at the gay girl for being gay, rather than at the school for being backward.

    This Begley girl who was accidentally honest for the rest of the country to read, says the last year has been lousy, well whose fault is that. All that crap just to keep a girl from wearing a tux. Was it worth it? And now this double dealing sneaky stuff to get around a court order…they will be back in court, and the judge may be a bit ticked off this time. *gets out some popcorn*

    You think this is over? This isn’t over. This whole town thinks they were so smart to trick a girl, they are going to find out what lousy means.

  40. Bill
    April 9, 2010 at 1:55 am #

    Uhh… since when did we have to tell the school who we were bringing to prom? I don’t really remember requesting permission if it was alright if I brought my date. I bought the tickets and that was it. If it was well known that Constance was an out (and perhaps loud) lesbian and she was going to bring her significant other to prom, that’s one thing. But if she went out of her way, more or less, to proclaim that she was taking another female to the prom as her “date” and they were romantically involved, isn’t that exploiting her own persecution? She should know that where she lives, tolerance should not necessarily be expected (although it should be, admittedly). I don’t think she is entirely innocent in this matter, and anyone who is going to boldly assert one side’s “obvious” right-ness over the other, should really take some time and consider the whole picture. Forgive the lack of eloquence, but I am a little drunk. We all need to stop being so quick to judge… The town is obviously bigoted in some of it’s social views, but, the way the situation was handled on both sides is simply rediculous. It really does seem like it was a cry for attention, and not the kind of attention that will expedite the acceptance process. Constance is just bringing more negative press to homosexuals. As a homosexual myself, I think i would side with the school. Flame away.

  41. Chrematisai
    April 9, 2010 at 4:17 am #

    @Phoenix Blaze: YES. A million times yes. THAT is righteous anger if I ever saw it, right there.

  42. Kirk C
    April 9, 2010 at 4:56 am #

    Lindsey and her pals will grow to regret their part in this unkind act just as their older relatives have grown to regret the ugliness they perpetrated when their schools were racially integrated.

  43. Jimmy Fury
    April 9, 2010 at 11:09 pm #

    @ Bill

    At my school we had to tell them who our date was if we bought two tickets. Nothing discriminatory though, all my lesbian friends brought their girlfriends. It was to keep out people who had gotten in trouble and banned from prom.

  44. Xkeeper
    April 9, 2010 at 11:44 pm #

    The sad part about this is that if it was just the handicapped students, this would be all over the news with neigh-unanimous disagreement with how this happened.

    The fact the person they turned away is gay suddenly makes it perfectly acceptable to do this, though.

    Disgusting double standards.

  45. Velma
    April 13, 2010 at 7:29 pm #

    @ Bill “tolerance should not necessarily be expected (although it should be, admittedly). I don’t think she is entirely innocent in this matter”
    Innocent of what?? She probably knew she’d be turned away at the door if she turned up with another girl on her arm and/or wearing a tux. YES this was an attention grab, which is a long-standing (and effective) tool in the civil rights movement. Constance might benefit personally (in addition to tolerating a great deal of negative attention) but she couldn’t have predicted in what way; the purpose was to draw attention to the school’s discrimination, and hopefully prevent future discrimination against other gay students. The students look especially ugly because instead of sympathizing with Constance and supporting her, they whined about missing prom, AND excluded Constance from the “real” prom, blaming her for the school board’s mistake.
    As others have mentioned, Constance’s mother is gay, and no doubt encouraged her, maybe even helped plan all this. Someone else, on another site, dug up this very pertinent story about a girl who was the first black student at a segregated high school, who was also misdirected in order to “save” prom for the “normal” (in this case, white) kids.
    http://news.google.com/newspapers?id=XSAfAAAAIBAJ&sjid=qacEAAAAIBAJ&pg=6862,5131613
    Note the parts that mention Carolyn King’s parents’ stake in her attending a white school. You could argue that they used her as a pawn, and that it was terrible, but she doesn’t seem the least bit regretful, despite how much pain it caused her.

  46. Rachel
    April 28, 2010 at 12:31 am #

    If this is really what they have to tell themselves in order to stay secure in their own moral superiority and (most likely) good old Christian values, then we’ve obviously made no progress whatsover in the fight against ignorant intolerance. The fact that the adults in this community are so clearly grooming these kids to be a whole new generation of bigoted, useless blights on society and humanity is not only disgusting, but remarkably disturbing. There’s such a severe lack of ethics and basic human decency. The community and all the people in it who perpetuate this kind of heartless, ungodly nonsense deserve every last scrap of disdain and condemnation the world can pile on their heads. And frankly, I hope there’s a way that school can lose a large portion of its government funding given the way they’re enforcing thinly-veiled religious beliefs in an institution where they have no place.

  47. Sam
    March 10, 2011 at 12:36 pm #

    I commend Constance for her willingness to make a big deal out of this. Everyone who favors treating other people (including the mentally handicapped) in this lousy manner need to realize that the majority of the nation is not on their side.

  48. Henry Bowman
    July 2, 2011 at 6:24 pm #

    Of course, the whole “fake prom” was set up because Constance was such a b**h that nobody wanted to be around her anymore. Interesting argument. I wonder how the “special needs students” ALSO ended up at the separate party with Constance, instead of the “private party” with all the “cool kids?” Were the special needs students whiny attention-seekers too? Or (Occam, put the razor down!) is it more likely that the “cool kids” were just cliquish BIGOTS?

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